The Morality Squad is a group of jingoistic, devoutly Christian, and morally indignant "superheroes" who stand against GWAR and everything else they deem un-American, obscene, offensive, or wrong.
They are the titular characters of the GWAR song of the same name.
Edna P. Granbo
A grouchy old lady with a giant, ugly head and bulging eyes, Granbo is the chairwoman of the Morality Squad. She rides around in a four-wheeled, fusion-powered wheelchair-tank with circular saw blades mounted on mechanical arms she calls her "Holy Hot Rod" and wields a pump-action shotgun. She is sometimes seen on foot using crutches identical to the ones used by fellow member Dr. D. Bill Adated. She also has associates who were trained by the American Central Intelligence Agency.
- Her surname is a pun on "granny" and the action movie character John Rambo.
Granbo's grandson and all-American superhero, Corporal Punishment is a beefy, 'roided-up man wearing a stereotypical superhero costume themed after the American flag. He often goes on patrols at night, beating up anyone he finds to be unpatriotic. He had previously served in the war in Iraq. He is said by Granbo to be "stronger than Superman", "sells more t-shirts than Batman", and "is more self-righteous than George Bush himself."
- His name comes from the term "corporal punishment", which refers to physical punishment or punishment under law that includes imprisonment or death.
- His feature as a Superman-like superhero may be deliberate, as criticisms began in the late 1980s and 1990s of how superheroes were rather an extension and figure head of the government and the law rather than general humanistic morality of their own agency. Comics made in the United States, specifically mainstream industry publishers like Marvel and DC, were known to have followed the Comics Code, a code of set guidelines and censorship standards to comply with "family-friendly" regulations enforced in the 1950s, and were believed to have stagnated comics in terms of writing and literary integrity since.
Corporal Punishment's lackey. He wears a red-and-white striped shirt and a yellow thong, and has a red bandana covering most of his face, with a pair of bulging, bloodshot eyes popping out.
- The name "Private Parts" was originally used by Corporal Punishment during on-stage performances.
- His name is a pun on a non-offensive slang term for genitals.
Granbo's nephew, who she describes as "a hundred tons of man". Ironic to his name, Tiny is the largest member of the Morality Squad and serves as its muscle alongside Corporal Punishment, appearing as an ogre-like humanoid with babyish proportions, having a giant head as big as his body and stubby but muscular limbs. When he was vertically sliced into two halves, each of them were able to act and fight independently.
Dr. D. Bill Adated
An injured mad scientist who created Tiny for the Morality Squad. He has a goofy overbite and goggles, and wears a lab coat. He walks with a pair of weaponized crutches, with spiked feet that can be shot out at opponents via a spring-loaded mechanism. He tends to have bouts of spastic rage and mental instability when talking about his accomplishments, which are for the widespread distribution of experimental pharmaceutical drugs to test on the general population, and apparently has Nazi-rooted beliefs of "wiping out the inferiors of America" through medical science.
- His name is an oxymoronic pun on the term "debilitated", referring to his perpetually injured state.
The Morality Squad's religious representative, who was enlisted to crucify GWAR in the media during the events of America Must Be Destroyed. In Phallus in Wonderland, he was convicted of child molestation and sodomy of a 12-year-old choir boy. Despite clear evidence of Bohab's crimes, the Squad felt he was framed (particularly by Sleazy P. Martini, who took part in exposing him). He was released and the charges were dropped. He is later seen with a crowd picketing against GWAR, when they themselves, alongside Sleazy, brutally attack the protest group. Bohab himself was disemboweled and then sodomized with his own cross.
- His name comes from the GWAR-made term "bohab", which is short for "habitually boring", the opposite of what GWAR and their fans are. The term would come to be applied to GWAR fans.
- The Morality Squad, as a whole, is a scathing political satire of American conservative Christians and Republicans, particularly during the presidency of George H.W. Bush, and were known to have supported or were comprised of "Morality In Media" groups that demanded censorship on any form of art or media they found offensive or blasphemous to their beliefs. Rock n' roll music, and especially metal music, was one of their prime targets during the 1980s.
- The Squad stealing the Cuttlefish of Cthulu from Oderus Urungus is based on the incident on September 18th, 1990, where David Brockie (who portrayed Oderus) was arrested on obscenity charges with his codpiece confiscated by the police after wearing it during a show.